he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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