I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
