just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
