TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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