oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
She told me I should be a condom model.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
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