it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
