I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
