Capitaan dildo arrescate!
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize
