Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
