There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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