How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
I just heard a mom tell her toddler son "shut the fuck up. Don't ask me to buy you shit when i'm taking u to go see some fucking animals" welcome to the bronx.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
