New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize
