Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
