Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize
