We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
she looked like the before picture.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Randomize
