and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
Randomize
