So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
