shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Randomize
