If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
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