I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
We just shotgunned beers for America
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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