I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Found your dick twin last night
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
