yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
Randomize
