okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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