so that wasnt chicken after all
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize
