Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
