I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize