it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
