I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
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