Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
