I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
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