We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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