yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
you didnt know i had herpes?
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
