I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Randomize
