pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
