yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Randomize
