Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
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