Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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