think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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