I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
