Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
