I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Randomize
