Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
