The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
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