could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
