Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
Randomize
