I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
