Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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