remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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