covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Randomize
