after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
